Hi,I did the following:
Q&A: I need a humorous poem for written by a famous or fairly famous poet?

I have to recite a humorous poem in school soon. It should actually be funny but not like immature because im 14 and I need a mature humor poem. Please dont say ‘Messy Room’ by Shel Silverstein.
Please help.
Thank you soo much

The answer in the following:

Answer by jo
SPEAK, DEATH

I am the anonymous taxi driver;
I am your last love affair;
I stop and open my tender door
when other cars pass on.

Gary Snyder

(untitled)

For the great Gaels of Ireland
Are men that God made mad,
For all their wars are merry
And all their songs are sad.

G.K Chesterton

Answer by Civil
Drive Thru
by Nancy Ness

I rose this morn with much to do -
Hopped in the car and off I flew.

No time for breakfast, that I knew -
Glad “Dunkin DoNuts” has Drive Thru.

In need of dollars, quite a few -
Went to the bank teller’s Drive Thru.

Then filled all my prescriptions too -
At “Pharmacy’s” brand new Drive Thru.

Some bills to mail in box of blue -
Off to the “Post Office” Drive Thru.

Picked up the laundry cleaned anew -
Just stopped at “Suds & Duds” Drive Thru.

With lunchtime near, my tummy’s queue -
Got a “Big Mac” from the Drive Thru.

The car by then was low on fuel -
Full serve at “Shell”, just Drive on Thru.

And when they fill the tank for you -
Your car’s washed free – in their Drive Thru.

Library books were overdue -
The curbside slot is a Drive Thru.

Then videos must go back too -
“Blockbuster” has their own Drive Thru.

In need of milk and bread, I knew -
I stopped at “Dairymaid’s” Drive Thru.

The family asked “Please, can we do -
The “Drive In” show when dinner’s thru???”

__________________________________

anyone lived in a pretty how town by E. E. Cummings

anyone lived in a pretty how town
(with up so floating many bells down)
spring summer autumn winter
he sang his didn’t he danced his did

Women and men(both little and small)
cared for anyone not at all
they sowed their isn’t they reaped their same
sun moon stars rain

children guessed(but only a few
and down they forgot as up they grew
autumn winter spring summer)
that noone loved him more by more

when by now and tree by leaf
she laughed his joy she cried his grief
bird by snow and stir by still
anyone’s any was all to her

someones married their everyones
laughed their cryings and did their dance
(sleep wake hope and then)they
said their nevers they slept their dream

stars rain sun moon
(and only the snow can begin to explain
how children are apt to forget to remember
with up so floating many bells down)

one day anyone died i guess
(and noone stooped to kiss his face)
busy folk buried them side by side
little by little and was by was

all by all and deep by deep
and more by more they dream their sleep
noone and anyone earth by april
wish by spirit and if by yes.

Women and men(both dong and ding)
summer autumn winter spring
reaped their sowing and went their came
sun moon stars rain

_______________________________

maggie and milly and molly and may by E. E. Cummings

maggie and milly and molly and may
went down to the beach(to play one day)

and maggie discovered a shell that sang
so sweetly she couldn’t remember her troubles,and

milly befriended a stranded star
whose rays five languid fingers were;

and molly was chased by a horrible thing
which raced sideways while blowing bubbles:and

may came home with a smooth round stone
as small as a world and as large as alone.

For whatever we lose(like a you or a me)
it’s always ourselves we find in the sea

________________________________

By mathematician Augustus DeMorgan, based
on a poem from Johnathan Swift:

“Great fleas have little fleas upon their backs to bite ‘em,
And little fleas have lesser fleas, and so ad infinitum.
And the great fleas themselves, in turn, have greater fleas to go on,
While these again have greater still, and greater still, and so on.”

___________________________________________________

Answer by BlueFeather
The Ant

The ant has made herself illustrious
By constant industry industrious.
So what? Would you be calm and placid
If you were full of formic acid?

The Germ

A mighty creature is the germ,
Though smaller than a pachyderm.
His customary dwelling place
Is deep within the human race.
His childish pride he often pleases
By giving people strange diseases.
Do you, my poppet, feel infirm?
You probably contain a germ.

both poems by Frederick Ogden Nash (1902—1971)

Verse For A Certain Dog

Such glorious faith as fills your limpid eyes,
Dear little friend of mine, I never knew.
All-innocent are you, and yet all-wise.
(For Heaven’s sake, stop worrying that shoe!)
You look about, and all you see is fair;
This mighty globe was made for you alone.
Of all the thunderous ages, you’re the heir.
(Get off the pillow with that dirty bone!)

A skeptic world you face with steady gaze;
High in young pride you hold your noble head,
Gayly you meet the rush of roaring days.
(Must you eat puppy biscuit on the bed?)
Lancelike your courage, gleaming swift and strong,
Yours the white rapture of a winged soul,
Yours is a spirit like a Mayday song.
(God help you, if you break the goldfish bowl!)

“Whatever is, is good” — your gracious creed.
You wear your joy of living like a crown.
Love lights your simplest act, your every deed.
(Drop it, I tell you—put that kitten down!)
You are God’s kindliest gift of all — a friend.
Your shining loyalty unflecked by doubt,
You ask but leave to follow to the end.
(Couldn’t you wait until I took you out?)

by Dorothy Parker (1893—1967)

What do you think? Answer below!