Military branch rivalry jokes?
December 2, 2010
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Posted by admin
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Q&A: Military branch rivalry jokes?
I was taking to my boyfriend a few days ago, who’s in the Army. I mentioned some Air Force ROTC guy I was talking to and the first words out of his mouth were “Fucking Fly Boy”. I laughed SO hard.
That was the first time I saw the rivalry between branches first hand, even though I knew it existed before.
I know its like sibling rivalry or college rivalry and in the end all is forgiven. So, in attempt to make me laugh for the best answer, anybody can share there personal little remarks against other branches. (Little remarks, not entire jokes.)
Of course, I am unfairly biased to the Army, because there’s a certain soldier who has my heart, but anything you can throw at me is welcomed. 
Q&A:
Answer by 20100210 19D Fort Knox
I know Marines that calls the Army “Aren’t Really Marines Yet”
I know some soldiers that say Marines stand for ” My Ass Rides In Navy Equipment Sir”
I know some people call the Air Force ” Chair Force”
I constantly hear these when i’m at the recruiters office
Answer by Alex H
The Marine Corps is a Department of the Navy, the Men’s Department
Answer by MikeGolf
Why is the Marine corps part of the Navy and the K-9 corps part of the Army?
There was a huge argument over who got what – and the Navy lost.
Answer by bobusmc10
WE STOLE THE EAGLE FROM THE AIR FORCE, THE ANCHOR FROM THE NAVY AND THE ROPE FROM THE ARMY.
ON THE SEVENTH DAY WHILE GOD RESTED, WE OVERRAN HIS PERIMETER, STOLE THE GLOBE AND WE’VE BEEN RUNNING THE WHOLE SHOW EVER SINCE.
WE LIVE LIKE SOLDIERS, TALK LIKE SAILORS, AND SLAP THE HELL OUT OF BOTH OF THEM.
WARRIORS BY DAY, LOVERS BY NIGHT, PROFESSIONALS BY CHOICE, AND MARINES BY THE GRACE OF GOD.
Answer by Dave Grohl Wanna Be!!!!
Muscles Are Required Intelligence Not Essential (MARINE)
Edit: I’m a big fan of Marines, but why do there seem to be way more jokes on Marines than any other branch even though they have probably one of the best reputations of them all?
What do you think? Answer below!
Categories: Today’s Joke
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Tags: branch, jokes, Military, rivalry
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Ok now, be a good sport, guys…
So there was a Marine who walks into a room and sees a little boy.
The little boy was like, “Wow, are you really a United States Marine!”
The Marine says, “Hell yeah, son! Do you want to wear my hat?”
“Yeah!” and so the Marine took off his hat and put it on the little boy, and leaves.
Then an Airborne Ranger comes in, *BOOM* kicking down the door as he enters.
The little boy looks up at the Ranger and says, “Wow, are you really a United States Army Airborne Ranger?”
“Yeah! Why? do you want to suck my D***??”
Then the little boy says, “No, I’m not a Marine, I’m just wearing the hat.”
Sailors call the Marines grunts.
Grunts call the Sailors squids.
Grunts ride on the backs of sailors – I hope it only means riding on the ship that belongs to the sailors…haha.
P.S. BTW, here’s the killer: Question: Do you know how to get the Marines to get in line for nothing? Put 2 or 3 sailors near a door looking in.
There are even rivalries between different forces within the Navy.
Sailors working on the ships are called S.H.O.E (Stupidest Human On Earth). If you work in the submarines, then, you are a “Bubble Head.” Aviation, “Air Head.”
Marines are also called ” bunch of *ucking Trees” (All breathe, no brain).
Air Force:Men who sit in there chairs and proudly claim there weak as females but are really smart! also Bird shitters up in thier planes!
Navy: Pot bellied lazy men who take us Marines to go FIGHT!
Army: Soilders who ain’t got the BALLS to be a Marine! Wanna be Infantry men!
Coast Guard:Wanna be Navy men who just stay here in the Untied States and don’t leave the Coast!
Marines:Globe,Anchor, and Eagle for Fighting LAND,SEA,AND SKY! Unlike any other Force!LONGEST BASIC TRAINING! EVERY MARINE IS A RIFLE MAN/WOMAN! The Few and Proud! The Marines!OOORRRAAAHH!!! SEMPER FIDELIS
Differences between basic training in the army/navy/marines and the airforce? In the airforce they teach you wash your hands after your pizz.
In the army/navy/marines they teach you not to pizz on your hands.
Got two for you:
Of all the Services, the Air Force has the most intelligent enlisted people. This is not just theory; it’s provable fact.
Take the Army. When the stuff hits the fan, the young Army private wakes up to the bellowing of his First Sergeant. He grabs his BDUs out of his foot locker, dresses, runs to the chow-hall for breakfast on the fly, then jumps in his tank. Pretty soon, the company commander, a captain, arrives, gives him a big salute, and says, “Give ‘em Hell, soldier!”
Now take the Navy. When the stuff hits the fan, the young Sailor is eating breakfast in the mess. He hustles the 20 feet to his battle station, stuffing extra pastries in his pocket as he goes. There he sits, in the middle of a big, steel target, with nowhere to run, when the Captain comes on the 1MC and says, “Give ‘em Hell, Sailors! I salute you!”
Now take the Marines. When the stuff hits the fan, the young Marine is kicked out of bed by his First Sergeant and puts on the muddy set of BDUs he was wearing on the field exercise he was part of three hours earlier. He gets no breakfast, but is told to feel free to chew on his boots. He runs out and forms up with his rifle. Pretty soon, his company commander, a captain, comes out, gives the Marine a sharp salute, and says, “Give ‘em Hell, Marine!”
And then there’s the Air Force. When the s*** hits the fan, the Airman receives a phone call at his off-base quarters. He gets up, showers,shaves, and puts on the fresh uniform he picked up from the BX cleaners the day before. He jumps in his car and cruises through the McDonalds drive-thru for an Egg McMuffin and Coca-Cola on his way into work. Once at work, he signs in on the duty roster. He proceeds to his F-15, spends 30 minutes pre-flighting it, and signs off the forms. Pretty soon the pilot, a young captain arrives, straps into the jet, and starts the engines. Our young Airman stands at attention, gives the aviator a sharp salute, and says, “Give ‘em Hell, Captain!”
2nd Joke:
When the war kicks off, the Navy sailor who has been on a boat for six months, fires off a missile and says “this is the SH!T !!”
An Army soldier is parachuted into a combat zone with bullets flying and yells “I love this SH!T !!”
A US marine storms the beach with with bullets flying & sand being kicked up by explosions and confusion all around and he screams “I was born for this SH!T !!!”
An Air Force airman gets into his rental car, drives and checks into his 5 star hotel, walks into his room and finds out the air conditioner is broken and says “What kind of SH!T is this ?!”